LGBT+ History Month: Navigating Top Surgery as a Freelance Trans Musician
For transgender and non-binary individuals, gender-affirming care can be a vital step toward improved mental and physical well-being. One musician recently shared their experience navigating top surgery – a procedure to create a more masculine chest – as a freelancer in the UK, highlighting both the practical and emotional realities of the process.
Financial Considerations and Planning
Top surgery costs can range from £5,000 to £12,000+, with additional expenses for travel, time off work, recovery supplies, and the initial diagnosis of gender dysphoria. However, in Spain, an informed consent model means a diagnosis isn’t always required. The musician began saving by taking on extra work – touring, commissions, teaching, and workshops – but learned a valuable lesson about tax payments, now setting aside 20% of each invoice.
The Emotional Impact of Fundraising
To afford the surgery, the musician utilized fundraising platforms like GoFundMe, alongside merchandise sales and donations at gigs. This decision, while necessary for mental health, brought about a heightened sense of gender dysphoria during performances. Simply stating the need for funds to address chest dysphoria felt like drawing unwanted attention to the very body part causing distress. This experience underscores how fundraising can unexpectedly amplify pre-existing dysphoria.
Navigating these conversations proved challenging, requiring the development of boundaries and phrases to deflect invasive questions. The musician also found support from a therapist in determining how much to share publicly and maintaining privacy during their transition. A strong network of trans friends and online communities proved invaluable for sense-checking experiences and finding understanding.
Balancing Recovery with Freelance Work
Choosing the timing of surgery was crucial, with January selected due to a slower work schedule and the availability of support from fellow musicians and performers. While recovery typically takes 6-8 weeks, individual experiences vary. The musician, accustomed to managing pain due to a disability, felt physically okay relatively quickly, but experienced mental fogginess. For approximately five months post-surgery, heavy lifting was restricted, requiring assistance during a tour seven weeks after the procedure. The flexibility of freelance work allowed for working from bed and taking naps as needed.
Returning to Performance
The musician’s primary concern before surgery was the impact on their ability to play guitar. After three weeks of recovery, returning to the instrument proved to be a profoundly positive experience. Playing Joni Mitchell’s “Little Green” felt like a moment of wholeness, with the guitar against a newly affirmed chest offering a sense of liberation from dysphoria.
The musician reflects that while surgery is understandably scary and painful, the experience, a year later, is viewed with joy and gratitude.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does top surgery involve?
Top surgery, also known as mastectomy for transgender and non-binary individuals, is a gender-affirming procedure that involves the removal of breast tissue to create a flatter, more masculine chest. It may also include nipple grafts or resizing.
Where did the musician have their surgery?
The musician traveled to Madrid to undergo top surgery.
What challenges did the musician face while fundraising?
The musician experienced heightened gender dysphoria while fundraising, finding it difficult to discuss their need for surgery without drawing unwanted attention to their chest. They also encountered uncomfortable questions and conversations about trans rights from those with less understanding.
How might your own approach to healthcare planning change after learning about the practical considerations faced by a freelance musician undergoing gender-affirming surgery?