Need a recipe while grieving? Humility, humor, healthy hobbies
The human capacity for resilience is often tested by unforeseen circumstances, and for Michele Armbrust, a nurse from Medford, Wisconsin, that test came in the form of a life-altering accident suffered by her husband, Jeff. Their story, rooted in faith and community, illustrates the profound strength found in acceptance, humility, and the willingness to receive support during times of immense hardship.
A Foundation of Faith
Michele’s early life was deeply influenced by her grandmother, who provided stability during a challenging time for her mother. These formative years included regular attendance at Mass, visits to her father at St. Camillus Hospital in Milwaukee, and interactions with nuns at the local Catholic school. These experiences instilled in Michele a desire to deepen her faith, a pursuit she continued while studying nursing at Viterbo University in LaCrosse, Wisconsin.
Unexpected Challenges
After meeting Jeff, who also considered a vocation to the priesthood, Michele balanced her nursing career with a growing family and active involvement in church ministry. They established a marriage preparation programme at their parish and enjoyed a fulfilling life together until July 2011. An accident at home left Jeff with a severe brain injury, initiating a long and arduous journey for Michele.
The following eleven years were characterized by a “long wait between two losses,” as Michele described it. Her role evolved from wife and partner to wife and caregiver. She found that the most difficult aspect of this period was grieving the loss of the relationship they once had, even while Jeff was still alive.
Finding Strength in Community and Faith
Michele navigated these challenges with the support of her three children, her local priest, and her parish community. She emphasized the importance of accepting help and relinquishing pride in order to receive the support she needed. She found that allowing others to assist was not a sign of weakness, but rather an opportunity for them to experience the joy of giving.
She continued to work full-time, relying on healthy habits and self-care to sustain her through the daily demands of caregiving. Michele acknowledged the difficulty of some days, but ultimately found strength in the belief that “you don’t know how strong you are until being strong is the only thing you can be.”
After Jeff’s death in April 2022, Michele experienced a sense of relief, having learned to accept the present moment and trust in God’s plan. She found serenity in focusing solely on her faith, believing that true joy is not dependent on another person but resides in Christ.
Looking Ahead
In recent years, Michele has become more involved in her parish, joined her community’s disability board, and continued her husband’s work with a local organization. She remains open to discerning God’s direction for her life, consistently receiving the message to share “good news” through gratitude and joy. While acknowledging the temptation to dwell on loss, she actively chooses to focus on blessings. Michele will continue to expand her community involvement, potentially taking on leadership roles within her parish or local organizations. She may also continue to seek opportunities to share her story and offer support to others facing similar challenges. Analysts expect that her commitment to faith and service will remain central to her life.
Frequently Asked Questions
What role did Michele’s grandmother play in her upbringing?
Michele’s grandmother was a significant figure in her life, providing stability during a difficult time for her mother and introducing her to the Catholic faith through regular church attendance and visits to her father at St. Camillus Hospital.
How did Jeff’s accident change Michele’s role in their marriage?
Jeff’s accident transformed Michele’s role from wife and partner to wife and caregiver, requiring her to provide long-term care and support while grieving the loss of their previous relationship.
What did Michele learn about strength during her husband’s illness?
Michele learned that true strength is revealed when being strong is the only option, and that it’s okay to not always be strong and to allow oneself to fall apart occasionally.
What does it mean to find joy and purpose amidst profound loss and hardship?